Minutes of the April Fools' Day 2005 Tevatron Dept Meeting 1. News (Vladimir): DoE review went relatively well, overall mark is about B+, repeated recommendations to increase beam time for machine development. 2. XiaoLong on operations: 8 stores since last Fri, Lumi from 65 to 93e30, one store lost due to lightning glitch, longitudinal instability occured twice because of incorrect control of the damper gain in store; luninosity lifetime is better (8-->10 hrs) for low lumi stores. 3. On A48 collimator: a) Sasha Drozhdin's simulations predict factor of 3 better CDF shielding during kicker prefires for every 20-25 cm we add to the A48 collimator length; b) Dean and Ron demonstrated that in recent kicker prefires A48 intercepted almost all bunches it was supposed to intercept, we still need to figure out how we damaged A48 spool piece; c) Rob Roser & CDF folks expressed interest in having 1.5 long collimator and will respond within a month(s) whether Roman pots can be removed. 4. (Project reports) Bob Webber on BPMs: 4 more houses of new BPM electronics installed this week, that makes 11 out of 27 total; several more ready for installation next week; pbar channels still need better tuning (see some incorrectness during stores with longitudinal instabilities) 5. Vladimir on TEL-2: SC solenoid passed high current test (B=6.5T field achieved without quench), vacuum tests and more B-measurements to follow, a solution for 14kV modulator found, PO signed; fancy Teslameter found 30% miscalibrated and sent back to LakeShore, Inc. 6. Andreas on IPM: controlled leak tested, flex cable issue still to be resolved, full system test to start soon (next week?); installation of electronics in the tunnel needs 3 days - will wait till next long shutdown. 7. Aimin analyzed proton lifetime at 150 in many stores and observed significant bunch-by-bunch variation on central orbit (which might be due to beam loading) and on helix with different pbar cogging stages; analysis points to one (may be few) parasitic interaction points which drive the lifetime; her findings agree with Yuri's theoretical analysis of the 12th order resonance strengths. 8. Jean-Paul now sees betatron lines in F0 Vert TBT data taken by him and Vic at the end of a store (this is essentially base-band Schottky), unfortunately the tunes are not where other Schottky detectors see them; another short datataking experiment with VTICK noise source on is needed. 9. Yuri and Vic shared thoughts on longitudinal instability study results: dancing of bunches was only slightly affected by changes in the orbits and RF cavity frequencies, less phase injection error the better, need time to figure out what else can be tried; Alvin noted that bunches were dancing in the last millennium as well. Minutes recorded by V. Shiltsev; edited by R. Moore